Archive for July 22nd, 2012

Fear of Dying


I really enjoyed this article when it was published several months ago.

It was nice to see that someone else thinks about death and that I am not alone.  Granted this writer is about a decade older than me.

But look at the assumption that I just made.

Only older people think about dying.

It’s not right for someone “as young as I am” to think about dead. . . it’s abnormal.

Interesting thinking from a person who dearly believes that our greatest deed in life is to live our lives with the awareness of death always close.

And I totally respect what Kumiko is already thinking.

When you live alone, you wonder what if I were to die.  Who would know?

If you don’t have a spouse anymore or don’t have kids, you think, wow, someone will bathe me and possibly feed me some day.  What’s that going to be like.

I think about my grandmother who has dementia and the fights with her daughter, the confused calls to my mom, and the reality in which grandma lives in.  And I wonder, will that be my mom?  Will it be me?

And I think about others things as well.  I’ve worked at hospice and seen loving strangers take gentle care of patients and that gives me hope.  Who knows if I will leave this world in a way that I will be able to use hospice, but I am comforted in knowing that it could be an option.

It’s not about worrying and fretting.  It’s thoughtful thinking about the future and letting it inform who you are today.

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